Quid Novi?

Allison Tepper Singer

2007-03-18T11:01:00.000-07:00

This woman is some piece of work!!! She says within earshot of her Autistic daughter that she wanted to drive off a bridge but didn't because she has a Normal child at home also. Note that this woman made $120,000 last year for her "work" with Autism Speaks. ALSO note that no one in the Autism Speaks organization actually HAS Autism. They seem to just be these type of "loving" parents.

I'm off to go hug my Tiger and thank the Lord that He saw fit to give him to me instead of some wacked out mother. If ever I had the "why me?" question answered...this is it.

Hello!!

2007-02-13T00:04:00.000-08:00

The Best YouTube Ever

2006-10-19T21:29:00.000-07:00

Little Bit Country..............

2006-09-26T22:02:00.000-07:00

Are you a little bit country or a little bit rock and roll?

You're a little bit country if you have ever seen a headless chicken run away.
You're a little bit rock and roll if the head was in your mouth.

You're a little bit country if you have ever eaten a porkrind with hair still attached.
You're a little bit rock and roll if you have ever........................with hair still attached.

You're a little bit country if your dog has given you fleas.
You're a little bit rock and roll if your boyfriend has given you "fleas."

You're a little bit country if you chew on grass.
You're a little bit rock and roll if you smoke the grass.

You're a little bit country if you have ever worn leather chaps.
You're a little bit rock and roll if you have worn nothing but the leather chaps.

You're a little bit country if you have ever chased a pig.
You're a little bit rock and roll if the pigs have ever chased you.

I know for sure there are some readers out there that can come up with better ones than these!

Lookalikes??

2006-08-29T20:50:00.000-07:00

This is cool and I stole it from Jeff!

Inconvenient Truths...of Being Married to BigWhiteHat

2006-08-28T21:08:00.000-07:00

Hats and boots 24/7.
Getting knocked up every 2 years 'til I got fixed.
Some women just don't get that rubbing his smooth bald head is...NOT OK with me.
Nagging me to post something 24/7.
Boots just don't look good with shorts! Why can't he get that?
8 Seconds. Great for a bull ride...bad for a back rub.
Finding myself reutered all over Jeff's Blog.
Knowing that the day WILL come when longhorns will be mounted to the grill of my truck.
It only took him ten years to train me to like Cigars, Rush, Monday Night Football and UFC.

A Wedding Invitathion...

2006-06-23T12:20:00.000-07:00

Misther & Misthuss Sthewart Sthone

Request the honor of your

Presthenth

At the marriage of their daughter,

Sthusthan Sthephanie Sthone

And

Misther Stheven S. Guesth

Sthaturday, the sixthteenth of Augusth

Two thoushand and sixth

At sixth o’clock in the evening.

St. Josthephs’s Epithscopalian Church

Bosthton, Massthachusthettsth

Love Letterth

2006-05-28T22:24:00.000-07:00

The Following is an E-mail to Stheven S. Guesth from The Sthuper Sthexy Rectheptionisth, Sthusthan Sthone:

Dearesth Stheven,

I am ever stho flattered that sthomone shuch asth yourthelf hath notithed me. Often timesth thisth offith isth stho bithy, no one payth much attensthion to the sthaff.

I've had a sthecret crush on you from the moment I firsth heard your beautiful voith. But I wath too shy to sthay anything to you in perthon.

Now that I know that you have sthome interesth in me I felt I should take the firsth sthep to break the ith.

Usthually, my slithe lisp isth sthomwhat of a turnoff for mosth men. But I think in thith casthe, it isth mosthly a bonusth. I can't tell you how much of a releif it isth to have stho much in common.

Pleath feel free to call me at my housth anytime.

Hugth and kistheth,

Sthusthie

Inconvenient Truths...Of Working Out

2006-05-23T17:55:00.000-07:00

Foretting your MP3 Player makes you painfully aware of your surroundings.
If you have a little blister on your foot when you get on the treadmill, you'll still have it when you get off the treadmill.
When there are 3 different shows on 3 different televisions, you can't help but try to watch all 3.
Big muscle dudes look strange in business suits.
Teen age girls are not really there to work out.
If your bra size is less than a B cup, you still need a bra.
Big hoop earrings and a face full of make up won't make you sweat less.
You can see 2 fast food restaurants through the window from the treadmill.
A small part of you always fantasizes about bringing your dog to walk on the treadmill next to you.
The air conditioning works great. I saw more nips than when I was a new born.
There really is such a thing as being too tanned.
I can't tell what that tattoo is. She must have gotten that before she chunked up.

May 1st

2006-05-02T20:01:00.000-07:00

May 1st

1:13 Lunch at Posado's w/hubby...........$34.00

2:33 Wal-Mart.................$55.16

3:08 QT.............................$3.95

6:10 Cato Fashions..........$77.89

6:40 Target.....................$26.56

7:06 Payless Shoes............$3.23

7:19 Family Dollar.............$7.58

9:22 Target......................$45.43

Spending $253.80 0n Day Without An (Illegal) Immigrant

Priceless!

A Bath Loving Dog

2006-04-29T18:20:00.000-07:00

Boooooooorrriing.

2006-04-27T19:28:00.000-07:00

I'm bored as hell and I can't take it anymore!

In addition to writer's block I have a chronic case of sheer boredom. I mean really, nothing is entertaining to me today. Or yesterday, or the day before. (except all my favorite bloggers. I love your blogs.)

I had a teacher once tell me that only stupid people are bored. She meant well, but it didn't really help me conquer those feelings at the time. But her comments did blaze into my subconsciousness, so that every time I do feel bored I think I also feel stupid. Ahh teachers...thank God for them.

Don't get me wrong, I love my children. I love my husband. I am somewhat content in my life as it is right now. But I feel like maybe I should be shaking things up. Trying something totally new. Or trying something old that I used to like to do. Like roller skating. Man , I loved to skate. I discovered a few months ago that even though I am much bigger than I was at age 10, I can still do it. I was at a birthday party for my son's school mate. My son can't skate so I donned a pair of 4 wheel rentals to attempt to teach him how. I did great. He hugged the rails. It was cute. I didn't want to leave. I felt like a kid again.

Maybe this weekend I can talk my family into going to the skating rink and trying it out. I'll take the camera so we can all get a laugh! Now there's a good future post.

On Blogging

2006-04-23T17:51:00.000-07:00

I can't believe I have been blogging for over a year now. When I first started this I knew less than nothing. Now I know a little more than nothing, but still not much. I went into this whole thing blind. I used to just hit "next blog" and kind of read whatever caught my eye. After going through 30 or so teenager's blogs though, I got really bored. Then I found some regular readers, or they found me. Then I got my husband involved and he is a blogging fiend.

I've gone through reading some people I really loved to read daily, and then they quit blogging. I've gone through having trolls write nasty things about me in my own comments section and highlighting me on their blogs. I've gone through days where it seems like I have spent all day reading blogs, and days where I just have nothing to say.

And now I am at that point where I question whether or not I will ever have anything else to write about. I wonder if I should quit, or take a long break. Everyone goes through this right?

So to those that like my blog, don't worry, my writer's block will pass. To those who don't like my blog, (why are you still here?) and you still haven't ruined it for me.

Sure, blame it on the dog.

2006-04-17T22:57:00.000-07:00

From Chuck Shepherd's News of the Weird:

Man's Best Friend (Except Sometimes)

In February, two girls (aged 12 and 13) ran away from home in Cleveland, headed by bus for Minneapolis, along with Bambi, one girl's family dog (represented to the driver as a "guide dog"). However, the girls overfed Bambi on junk food, and the dog became so flatulent as to cause a commotion on the bus, which eventually drew police officers, who then discovered the girls were runaways. [Plain Dealer (Cleveland), 2-15-06] (Orlando), 3-30-06]

No Really...a Boycott is planned May 1st

2006-04-13T20:06:00.000-07:00

Yup, because sometimes Marches are just not enough. Now "they" are planning a boycott? I'm confused as to which people in particular are planning to not go to work that day. Illegal aliens? Legal aliens? Hispanic people in general?

From the Washington Times:
"You can only march for so long to make your point," said Juan Jose Gutierrez, national coordinator for Latino Movement USA, an early proponent of the boycott. He said organizers need to keep the pressure on Congress to reject a House immigration bill that would make it a felony to be in the country illegally or to assist an illegal immigrant.

"You have to think of other creative ways to make it clear to Congress and the Bush administration that we expect them to behave responsibly," Gutierrez said. Organizers chose May 1, he said, because of "its special symbolism" as an international workers' day.

....Behave responsibly? Behave responsibly???? Since when is enforcing the law NOT behaving responsibly? Since when is it responsible on the part of the illegal immigrant to burden everyone else with their needs? What else do they want? Listen closely...they want to remain here ILLEGALLY. That is what they want. That is their bottom line, don't let the headlines fool you. Its NOT about being underappreciated. Its not about them doing jobs Americans supposedly won't do. Its about the possibility that their illegal behavior might just finally merit repercussions. How dare we enforce the law!

Personally, I don't see how this is going to work in their favor. I'm going to shop that day. Restaurants are going to make sure they are staffed by people willing to work. No amount of boycotts and people walking off the job is going to change my mind about supporting illegal behavior.

Buffalo Wild Wings

2006-04-11T20:54:00.000-07:00

If you look at the list, you'll see that there is no Buffalo Wild Wings being boycotted. Cheers!

Week Long Counter Boycott Planned in North Texas

2006-04-10T20:31:00.000-07:00

Well, in Plano anyway. My part of Plano. Ok, really probably just my family. Actually, probably just me.

So here is a short list of things that I am going to avoid this week.

Taquitos from Whataburger. (That one's really, really gonna hurt.)

Then there is Lite Wok, Pei Wei, New Chrystal, Arby's, MacDonald's, Wendy's, Braum's, Grandy's, Sonic, Pizza Hut, Dominoes, La Madeleine, Outback Steakhouse, Spagetti Warehouse, Olive Garden, Hooters, WingStop, Wings to Go, Schlotzky's, Popeye's, Church's Chicken, Long John Silver's, KentuckyFriedPizzaBell, On the Border (obviously.) The Philly Connection, Fuddrucker's, Cheddar's, Tony Roma's, Red Lobster, Bangkok City, The Blue Goose, Blue Mesa, Chick-Fil-A, Dairy Queen, Country Burger, Burger King, Burger Street, Pasado's, Abuelo's, Chili's, Joe's Crab Shack, Weinerschnitzel, Jack In the Box, Chipotle, Taco Cabana, TGIFridays, Humperdinks, Pappadeaux, Pappasito's, Pappa's Steak House, Texas Land and Cattle Steak House, Love and War in Texas, El Paso, Salt Grass Steak House, Spring Creek Barbecue, Dickey's Barbecue, Pancho's, Chubby's, Poor Richard's, Kosta's Greek Cuisine, Cafe Brazil, Chicken Express, Golden Chick, Taco Delite, Tino's, Tino's Too, Aparicio's,Dos Churros, Tres Amigo's, Cafe De France, Bennigan's, Steak and Ale, the Macaroni Grill, and Carrabba's.

Whew! Its gonna be a hard week but I think I can make it. I'll try not to pat any cute chihuahua dogs on the way.

I estimate this will have a drastic impact on the local economy but that it will in no way affect congress . And that is Ok too, because they don't really care about MY vote.

Tigons? Ligers?

2006-04-07T13:44:00.000-07:00

Zhao Yunhua took the rare photograph in Shenzhen Safari Park last weekend.

It's not unusual for tigers and lions to breed in safari parks - but it is seldom caught on film.

This year, two tigons - the product of a male tiger and a lioness - and three ligers - the cub of a male lion and female tiger - have been born in the park.

The five offspring are all growing up healthily, reports Shenzhen Evening Post.

I got the first picture over at Ananova.
I got the second one just by google searching tigons.

OMG. I also found a picture of a zonkey. But I decided to spare everyone the horror of that photo.

Autism "Awareness"

2006-04-05T19:13:00.001-07:00

www.gettingthetruthout.org

April is National Autism Awareness Month.

Here are some things about which I think everyone should be aware:

*Not every parent of an autistic child believes mercury or immunizations caused their child's autism.
*Many children with Autism behave alike but they are all vastly individual human beings.
* The Autism Society of America is NOT the voice of Autism, as they so boldly and arrogantly claim to be.
*If you want to learn about Autism, the best place to go is Neurodiversity.com. Read the things that actual Autistics have to say. Not money hungry "advocates."

From Jim Kraus

2006-03-31T15:08:00.000-08:00

INTAXICATION: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

REINTARNATION: Coming back to life as a Hillbilly.

SARCHASM: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

HIPATITIS: Terminal Coolness.

I Never Liked Sean Penn

2006-03-28T03:14:00.000-08:00

Hollywood activist SEAN PENN has a plastic doll of conservative US columnist ANN COULTER that he likes to abuse when angry. The Oscar-winner actor has hated Coulter ever since she blacklisted his director father LEO PENN in her book TREASON. And he takes out his frustrations with Coulter, who is a best-selling author, lawyer and television pundit, on the Barble-like doll. In an interview with The New Yorker magazine, Penn reveals, "We violate her. There are cigarette burns in some funny places. She's a pure snake-oil salesman. She doesn't believe a word she says."
27/03/2006 21:11
Source

Pity

2006-03-22T12:22:00.000-08:00

Main Entry: ¹pity
Pronunciation: 'pi-tE
Function: noun
Inflected Form(s): plural pit·ies
Etymology: Middle English pite, from Old French pité, from Latin pietat-, pietas piety, pity, from pius pious
1 a : sympathetic sorrow for one suffering, distressed, or unhappy b : capacity to feel pity
2 : something to be regretted pity you can't go>

Pity is an uncomfortable word to me. Even though its one of the most natural human responses to a misunderstood situation it remains an unwanted feeling. When people see someone who has any outwardly misfortune its pity that comes to the forefront of emotions. Its a genuine emotion, yet at the same time you don't want the person being pitied to feel pitied.

Somehow I learned early in life that others don't want to be pitied. I didn't have a handicapped friend, or anything like that. I think I just knew that it must be uncomfortable based on how I felt when someone did that to me. See, I was an only child. I was Fatherless. I was always the new kid at school. I wanted friendships, but not friendships based on pity. I wanted someone to get to know me and decide that I was so awesome that they just had to be my friend.

My own empathy took on a life of its own at an early age too. There wasn't a stray animal that I didn't just love with all my heart. I took pity on any pathetic creature that wander through my yard. In school there was never a kid I didn't at least say hi to. Especially a new kid! In my teen years it got worse. If a boy asked me on a date it was hard to say no. I didn't want to hurt his feelings, yet I knew he didn't want a pity date either.

Then somewhere along the way my self centeredness overshadowed my empathy. I was so self centered. It was all about me. Me, me, me, me! Other people's problems didn't mean much to me because I was busy making mountains out of the molehills that popped up in my life. I was making stupid decisions and stupid mistakes all along the way. I knew I was. I prayed to God about it. I prayed for wisdom. That was my first mistake.

See, God answers prayers, but not in the way you want him to. You get to learn your lessons the way He wants you to. Through the consequences of every decision you make you learn your lessons. You also learn through the gifts. Through my children I have learned to take on the world. I have learned how to talk to people. And having an autistic child has taught me that pity, while a natural reaction, is not for me. Its not for my son either. I've learned that he wants the same things I wanted as a kid. He wants people to get to know him and decide he is so awesome they just have to be his friend.

Not Husband Quotes

2006-03-20T13:24:00.000-08:00

10. I need to go buy some new underwear.
9. This TV is too big for the room.
8. Hot wings? I'm tired of hot wings!
7. Let's move the furniture around.
6. You drive.
5. Excuse me, can you tell me how to get to...
4. I don't want my boy playing football.
3. This steak is undercooked.
2. Let's get rid of my old t-shirts.
1. Just go to sleep already, I'm too tired...

Hot Husband Quotes

2006-03-16T22:28:00.000-08:00

10. I got a raise.
9. I already started dinner.
8. My parents are taking the kids for the weekend.
7. No, $100 is NOT too much to pay for a pair of
black pumps.
6. You've lost weight!
5. Dinner was delicious.
4. I bought you something.
3 I was wrong.
2. You were right.
1. I love you

Roe V. Wade For Men

2006-03-08T13:39:00.000-08:00

What about a man's right to choose? I have to admit they make a great point. I have been an advocate of Father's rights for a long time. I also feel they should be as responsible for contraception as a woman. But WAIT!! Am I saying that the time to choose is BEFORE conception?? Oh No...Is that what I am saying? Is that only a yes when it applies to men? I knew this question was going to turn up one day soon and here it is.

Everyone knows this suit is going to sink. Maybe they think whats good for the Goose should be good for the Gander. Maybe...but what about the wee little gosling?

That's what you get when you legislate from the bench!

My Spiritual Weekend in Waco

2006-03-05T13:55:00.000-08:00

...Now who on earth wouldn't want to eat at a place called Buzzard Billy's?

What a weekend! We had planned to drive to Kentucky to see my mom during the kid's spring break. But she has recently moved into a new condo and isn't settled and unpacked enough to entertain us all. So that is postponed until June.

We started the day by going to the Texas Ranger Museum and Hall of Fame . The only other plans were to go out to lunch then drive out to see family. Right after lunch we were headed back toward the freeway when we spotted it. There, in all its splendor, was the most beautiful museum I had ever seen in my entire lifetime. The Smithsonian, the Gugenheim, the Louvre...all Crap! That's right folks, this was the DR. PEPPER MUSEUM!

You see, Dr. Pepper was invented in Waco, Texas. And people wonder why we Texans are so proud...We invented Dr. Pepper for Pete's sake! This building happens to be the original 1906 Artesian Manufacturing and Bottling Company Building. It has 3 floors worth of Dr. Pepper artifacts. It was so beautiful. Really...words aren't enough. I'll leave you with the few pictures I managed to take.

Find the Weiner

2006-02-24T20:28:00.000-08:00

I Need A Sthecond Opinion!

2006-02-07T20:00:00.000-08:00

Dear Dr. Lipshith,

I am writing to you regarding your rethenth diagnothithes regarding my Thpeech Dithabilty. I wholeheartedly dithagree with your sthupid athethment of my stho called listhp. Perhapth you should athk your quethtions when I am not sthmoking sthigaretths. Thith was very irresthponthible on your part. Everyone knowths your lipsth don't exherthise a full range of mothsion while sthimulthaneousthly sthpeaking and sthmoking sthigaretths.

Althso, your sthutteringh made you very hard to understhand. Perhapth it ith YOU who hath a Thpeech Dithabilty. I sthrongly suggesth that you rethiefe sthpeech thherapy posth hasthe or sthooner.

Sintherely,

Stheven S. Guestht

P. Sth. I thought your Rethepthionistht wath STHUPER STHEXTHY! Pleath sthend me her e-mail addreth. Thank you in advanth.

A New Year's Update

2006-02-01T19:19:00.000-08:00

Its been a month since I listed my To Do List. Lets see what I've actually done!

1. Take as many naps as possible... Exactly 2.
2. Pay all my bills on time... Yes!
3. Read an entire book....um, no, but I bought one.
4. Clean out the garage... Started on it. Got through 4 big totes of old toys.
5. Tame the pile of papers that invade my countertops...Did you know leaving papers on any flat surface causes them to multiply?
6. Cook for my family at least 5 times a week...the record stands at 3 times in a row.
7. Call my mom at least once a week... I sure did!
8. Have as many massages as possible...unforunately, not a one.
9. Paint the inside of the house... Ibought all the stuff primed one wall. Woo Hoo!
10. Archive the family photos, scan everything, save everything...I got one very important picture restored.
11. Start a savings account for all the kids...not yet.
12. Start a savings account just for me and the hubby...also not yet
13. Carry my camera with me everywhere...nope
14. Get my nails done at least twice...I got them done a week ago
15. Go visit my grandmother...planned for February/
16. Stay in touch with old friends...already missed one call.
17. Stop using the words %$#@!, @%&*@!, and @#$#! so much. Crap!!
18. Try not to kill any plants... well, Hubby saved it. Bless his heart.
19. Plant flowers. Too early or the ones I want... Bulbs go in by the end of the month.
20. Jump on the trampoline with my kids...Boing!
21. Pray more often...I'm ashamed to say that I haven't. But I know I have been prayed For.
22. Shop less...Right!
23. Drink less...Dr. Peppers...still drinking them but not as often.
24. Learn to do something new, like knitting...haven't made the time, yet.
25. Delegate chores to the kids and keep up with their allowances...This is harder than it sounds. They have been helping more, and I am really proud of them for that!

COMMENTS POLICY

2006-01-31T17:12:00.000-08:00

Its come to my attention that I need to make known the very strict rules by which my comments section shall adhere:

First, comment threads exist for the sole purpose of entertaining Echotig.

Second, by the ability vested in Echotig by Haloscan, I, Echotig, can and will modify, edit or just plain make up any comments I choose.

Finally, I shall ban anyone I see fit to be banned, based on nothing more than my Whim. And if I get called a Fascist or a Nazi, well...that's just a Bonus!

Special thanks to BigWhiteHat. I basically ripped these off from his unwritten comments policy. That he makes up as he goes along.

More Scents

2006-01-24T17:50:00.000-08:00

Courtesy Of Greg at One Particular Harbor

1. '84 Ford Ranger (Interior)
2. Wet Labrador
3. Size 12
4. Sushi Fart
5. Something is under the Couch
6. Who unplugged the fridge?
7. Two Guys Camping
8. Doe in Heat
9. Sour Peat Moss

And Number Ten...
10. Granny!

Bad Scented Candle Ideas

2006-01-23T17:04:00.000-08:00

Fresh Dog Pile
Eau de Cat Pee
Fish
Vintage Marlboro
Has This Gone Bad?
Newborn Diapers
Burnt Popcorn
Spring Break in South Padre
Antique Beef
Fish
European Traveler
Fresh Cut Cheese
Frat Boy Breath
Eww
J Lo Glo
Milk Jug Surprise
Fat Elvis
That Old Car Smell
Equine Essence

Where did the Love Go?

2006-01-10T13:25:00.000-08:00

Baby Baby where did our love Go?

Do you remember when George was Governor and Fox had just become president?
How they looked at each other, how they smiled.
Those days are gone.
Now Bush wont even look at him when they shake hands (below).

They've lost that lovin' feelin' now its gone, gone, gone whoooo oh oh.

Thanks to Bloviating Zeppelin, for the picture and the idea.

60 Days

2006-01-08T20:18:00.000-08:00

Well, I am still reeling from the 60 day sentence a Judge in Vermont gave a Child Molester. It sickened me to hear that one, this "Judge" doesn't believe in punishment, and two, that he believes sex offenders can be rehabilitated. It disturbs me that he seemed more concerned with an ADMITTED Child Rapist's "rehabilitation" than the Sickening, Horrific Injustice of said Molester's acts upon a child of 7 years old. If this" Judge" so believes in rehabilitation, perhaps he is is in the WRONG line of work. What about this child? What about HER rehabilitation? After his 60 days this Child Rapist is a free man. (Even though he raped her for 4 years.) But that little girl will never be free of what that Child Rapist did to her soul. She will never be free from the HORROR of a "Judge" making light of the most undignified thing a human can do to another human.

60 days.

My heart and prayers go to that little girl, that she can someday feel safe. That she can someday have a normal relationship with a man. That she doesn't go through life thinking all men are as evil as these two. That she isn't filled with hate and distrust. That she never hates herself. That she never sinks into a depression so deep that she gives up on life. That she Survives, and sees herself as a Survivor, not a Victim. I pray that she still believes in God after all this.

You think that will happen in 60 days?

Here's a letter from Mark Twain to a newspaper Editor. I thought it was fitting.

My Dear Sir:

But you are proceeding upon the superstition that Moral Courage and a Hankering to Learn the Truth are ingredients in the human being's makeup. Your premises being wild and foolish, you naturally and properly get wild and foolish results. If you will now reform, and in future proceed upon the sane and unchallengeable hypothesis that those two ingredients are on vacation in our race, and have been from the start, you will be able to account for some things which seem to puzzle you now.

Sincerely yours,

S. L. CLEMENS.
Riverdale-on-the-Hudson, Dec. 21, 1901.

2006 To Do

2005-12-31T08:56:00.000-08:00

Now comes the point in most peoples lives where they review the year that has just swiftly passed them by. We think about all the things we did and didn't do. We resolve to make the coming year better than the last. You can probably tell I have already read many people's Resolutions. The lists were very personal, and sincere, and their resolutions were important. And so I'd like to add my own personal and sincere resolution list to the Blogosphere. Well, its more like a To-Do list, than resolutions. Whatever.

1. Take as many naps as possible.
2. Pay all my bills on time.
3. Read an entire book.
4. Clean out the garage.
5. Tame the pile of papers that invade my countertops.
6. Cook for my family at least 5 times a week.
7. Call my mom at least once a week.
8. Have as many massages as possible.
9. Paint the inside of the house.
10. Archive the family photos, scan everything, save everything.
11. Start a savings account for all the kids.
12. Start a savings account just for me and the hubby.
13. Carry my camera with me everywhere.
14. Get my nails done at least twice.
15. Go visit my grandmother.
16. Stay in touch with old friends.
17. Stop using the words %$#@!, @%&*@!, and @#$#! so much
18. Try not to kill any plants.
19. Plant flowers.
20. Jump on the trampoline with my kids.
21. Pray more often.
22. Shop less.
23. Drink less...Dr. Peppers.
24. Learn to do something new, like knitting.
25. Delegate chores to the kids and keep up with their allowances.

Christmas was great!

2005-12-29T13:59:00.000-08:00

I didn't get a chance to stop by anybody's blog to personally wish them a Merry Christmas. In real life I only sent out 4 Christmas cards. To say I was busy is an understatement to the extreme. Between work, an ever messy house, a big shopping list, and the kids being underfoot, well...I was busy.

So to the few of you that still stop by my blog to see if I have risen out of my funk to post a few lines...I hope you had a Merry Christmas and I hope you have a Wonderful New Year! It meant so much to me to read your kind words in BWH's comments.

We really did have a merry Christmas! BWH has only one brother, who is married with 5 kids. Usually they are there for Christmas and my mom in law's house is packed! But this year it was just our kids and parents. His brother had work responsibilities and got to take his kids out later in the week after we left. I teased my mom in law that she was getting to see her grandbabies in shifts. Later, my 9 year old asked me how they were getting there in "ships?" ha!

It was good to go back to the tiny town we lived in for the first five years of our marriage. Hubby and I agree thats it is good to be a newly wed couple in that environment. We were surrounded by older couples in that church who cared about us. Instead of a wedding shower we got pounded after we were just married. If you don't know what that is, and I didn't, its a little get together where they give you a pound of sugar, a pound of flour, and various other basic household goodies. It was very sweet. We had a nice country potluck as well. Our little church had many potlucks after that too. I really miss that!

We also got to spend some time out at his grandparents' farm. Hubby's aunt and uncle were there too. I really love them. They also used to live in that small town. Now they live in another small town and we don't get to see them as much.

Christmas morning was neat because it was Sunday. We had church to be at by 10:30. I think we all were up at 8:30. The kids were ready to get into the presents! It only took about 30 minutes to get everything opened. Hubby informed me that I would have to wait until after church to get my present and that it was out at the farm. Hmmph. That was not what I wanted to hear. When it comes to Christmas shopping I am the one that does it for our kids and even for his family. I guess he figures that I am better at it so the job goes to me. I don't mind, I enjoy it. Anyway, there have been years when I have even bought my own Christmas gift and wrapped it! Last year he took my daughter with him to help pick out something for me. This year he enlisted his mother to help. So he is getting better.

So after church the kids went with their grandparents, except for Tiger. We headed out to the farm. But then hubby took a detour and started driving down a different country road. It looked familiar. On the way we saw a cloud that was shaped like a a bird with its wings spread. It was one of the few clouds in the huge sky. It almost seemed out of place just hanging there. Almost like it was put there for my own personal enjoyment. I was upset that I had forgotten my camera.

We kept driving and it finally occurred to me that I knew exactly where we were going. We were headed out to this windmill. "Our" windmill. 12 years ago on an equally bright and sunny Christmas day we drove out to this windmill. It stood only about 12 paces from the road. he pulled over and as we stood beneath it he gave me my Christmas present. It was a music box that played Edelweiss. I had joked once that if he really loved me he would bring me edelweiss, like the young men in Austria would do for their sweethearts. You had to climb a mountain for edelweiss. I was very touched that he remembered that. And as I was listening to the tune he got down on one knee. With a shaky voice he asked me to marry him, and handed me a beautiful ring.

***Now I have to interrupt this story to let you know that the ring he gave me 12 years ago is no longer in my possession. His dad has it. I gave it to him to fix a couple of years ago. (he's a Jeweler.) I haven't got it back yet.***

So as we drove down that familiar stretch of road I got a little excited that perhaps I was getting my ring back! I even got a little sentimental tear in my eye. Hubby didn't see it though. I had sunglasses on. I looked back at our son and pondered the time that had gone by since I had been here last. Then we arrived. We left Tiger in the van and walked over to the windmill. The wind was blowing and the windmill was sqealing. I looked up at it and when I looked back at Hubby he was holding a ring. It was a new ring! A beautiful 18K ring with 30 diamonds in it. Which was not my original ring, but a neat surprise to say the least!

We drove back to the farm and spent a little while outside with Tiger, just enjoying the silence. He was happy to be there too. It truly was a peaceful Christmas.

On Mark Twain

2005-12-08T17:32:00.000-08:00

I notice that you use plain, simple language, short words and brief sentences. That is the way to write English--it is the modern way and the best way. Stick to it; don't let fluff and flowers and verbosity creep in. When you catch an adjective, kill it. No, I don't mean utterly, but kill most of them--then the rest will be valuable. They weaken when they are close together. They give strength when they are wide apart. An adjective habit, or a wordy, diffuse, flowery habit, once fastened upon a person, is as hard to get rid of as any other vice.
- Letter to D. W. Bowser, 3/20/1880

www.twainquotes.com

I love Mark Twain. I remember reading this first quote in highschool. It made me happy to hear a great writer such as Twain support the style of writing that I tried so hard to maintain. Its always bothered me to have to read through so many extra, pointless words to get to the point. Another saying I loved was "let your yes be yes and your no be no." That one was in the bible. In other words, give a definite answer. Don't be wishy washy. Say what you are going to say!

I left a snarky comment on someone else's comments section about this very thing. This person doesn't have a blog of their own, that I know of. Yet, he or she chooses to leave very long and frequent comments on other people's blogs. Its not even that this person doesn't have anything to say. Apparently they have much to say, but the forum they choose is not their own.

I kind of feel bad for leaving the comment where I did. But where was I supposed to leave it?

PASS IT ON

2005-12-02T17:01:00.000-08:00

ACLU
"Wishing You Merry Christmas"
125 Broad Street
18th Floor
New York, NY 10004

Dear Santa,

2005-11-28T20:06:00.000-08:00

I want some beans.

2005-11-28T19:13:00.000-08:00

Sandy wants to know more about my German ancestry. Well, I don't know that I would call it an ancestry. I actually don't know very much about my family.

I've written about my mom, who had me at a young age. My mom is a plain talking straight forward person. She never beat around the bush about things. And yet she is very charming and flirty too. English is also her second language. She knows Spanish as well. She is a most courageous woman. At the young age of 21 she moved a continent away from her family to be here in the states. I was 4. She moved here partly for a guy, but I think mostly for the adventure. I mean it was Texas for crying out loud! Who could resist?

I'm her only kid. Mom has one older sister, one older brother and a younger brother. My dad was the oldest of six. He died when I was a baby. I never knew him or his family. I thought my step dad was my actual dad until I was 7.

When we first got here I didn't speak for about 3 months. My first words in English were, "I want some beans." How's that for funny? I guess it was culture shock. My step family was Hispanic. (Texican.) I was 4. I mostly learned from watching TV. I think that makes me a true American.

Since I don't know much about my ancestry I am in the unique position to create my own. There is not much to know that would make much of a difference in who I am today. My kids, however, will know theirs. And that does my heart good.

MMMM....Cocktails

2005-11-18T23:31:00.000-08:00

I haven't been feeling myself lately. And if you really really knew me you might say that is a good thing! I have BiPolar. There, I said it. I am back on drugs for it, and I am enjoying them quite well. So maybe I could say I am feeling better than myself? Or, I hadn't been feeling myself for 2 years and now I am?

There is no one magic pill for this particular disorder, so I always end up trying a few things. Sort of like a prescription cocktail. Only not as tasty as a real cocktail. I finally got on something that addresses my anger "issues." The good doctor said it would work in 5 minutes. I laughed it off, but it was TRUE. Its fabulous. Its not that it prevents me from getting angry at all, it just prevents me from completely losing it. But not so much that I don't care about anything at all. As Goldilocks would say, its juuuust right.

I haven't found a drug that I have become addicted to yet. (Not even Vicodin!) But if this would make me feel as good as it did the first week, I could see myself always wanting it. The first week is always the most interesting.

And in other news, the hubster doesn't get Thanksgiving day off, so we will be staying in town. I'll console myself with the fact that I will get to do some much needed Christmas shopping the next day. There should be some good sales. We will have our daughters with us this Thanksgiving, so that also takes the sting out of not getting to go home that day.

I hope everyone who reads this blog has a wonderful Thanksgiving. There is so much to be thankful for!

Replacements

2005-11-13T15:58:00.000-08:00

I heard someone I respect say that little girls grow up to be women searching for a replacement for their Dads. They look for a father figure for their own future kids. Which got me to thinking, what if the girl had a terrible Dad, or none at all? Would she know what to look for? Would she always be searching for something that she just doesn't know? How would she know what exactly to look for?

Unfortunately I fall into both those catagories. My real Dad died when I was an infant. I dreamt of him alot. I wondered and daydreamed about what he might have been like. I guess you could say I longed for him. The only positive father figure I had was my grandpa. That only lasted 'til I was 4. Then we moved far away.

After that I had had a step father, briefly, who was just bad. The worst part was that I loved him. I wanted a Dad. Just a regular Dad.

When I was old enough to date, I dated completely different types of guys. Even some that had my friends and family really questioning my sanity. I was looking but I didn't know what for!

And now I worry about my oldest daughter from that first marriage. If she goes looking for a replacement for her dad, she'll be bad off. He's not a nice person. Actually he is a jerk. And thats being kind. Hopefully she will take the positives she gets from her step dad and apply that in her life.

Here's to good Dads!

For Exile

2005-11-07T19:12:00.001-08:00

I don't usually go politiblog, but a promise is a promise!

I was challenged to write about why Liberals hate Karl Rove. I'm not sure about why, but I know it started early in his life. At Wikipedia I found this: In 1960, at the age of 9 years old, Rove decided to support Richard Nixon. According to Rove, "There was a little girl across the street who was Catholic and found out I was for Nixon and she was avidly for Kennedy. She put me on the pavement and whaled on me and gave me a bloody nose. I lost my first political battle."

Of course Democrats hate him. They lose and Republicans win, and they have to have somebody to blame. They never think that they could have lost all on their own. It has to be somebody else's fault!

The Left, especially the Media, made a Bush template. Bush is a dumb, spoiled, frat boy. So Bush can't possibly be smart enough to beat them all the time. Therefore they blame Rove. They don't need proof! Just say it enough and it HAS to be true! Don't believe me? Google Rove's picture and look at all the Blogs about him. They have no substance, just empty rhetoric.

The Left is losing power, and losing more all the time. They lost both houses of Congress after owning Congress, more or less, for 70 years! They see the Supreme Court moving the other direction and they can't do anything about it.

So just like that first little Democrat he encountered, they try to throw him down on the pavement and bloody his nose. Their new modus operandi: Criminalize Conservitism.

Well the trouble with our liberal friends is not that they are ignorant, but that they know so much that isn't so! ...Ronald Reagan

A photo meme

2005-11-01T19:09:00.000-08:00

Favorite song ...I'll Melt with You
Grandma's name...Anna...this came up ????
Favorite food...MMM...Fajitas!
Favorite drink....
Name...thats Claudia Schiffer
Town I live in now...Plano

Town I was born in ...Wurzburg

All's Fair in Blog and War!

2005-10-31T20:33:00.000-08:00

This is in response to Not A Desperate Houswife's Halloween blog entry!

Haloscan

2005-10-31T20:17:00.000-08:00

Haloscan commenting and trackback have been added to this blog. I was getting tired of typing in squiggly letters every time I wanted to comment in my own blog. And also, big announcement:

My MOTHER has joined us all in the 21st century! She isn't even messing with dial up or AOL. She found out right away they both suck. She combined her phone, cable and computer all into one service. And she set the time on her old VCR. She's on roll!

Y'all Look at This Here Tumbleweed!

2005-10-25T19:46:00.000-07:00

Okay, its official. I am homesick!

This morning I had to take our van to the muffler place and then to get inspected. I got to the muffler place, and the guys were friendly enough, but not really. There was no extra conversation. There was no "How you doing today, gal?" No what do ya call it...Hospitality. Back home the hospitality was rampant. You couldn't set foot in a place of business without getting a full dose of extra conversation. I miss that.

After the muffler place I went on to the inspection station. All they do there is state inspections, no garage work if your car doesn't pass. Again, no extra hospitality there either. Its not like I was quiet either. I'm a chatty girl.

This is not the first day I have realized that its different here than in West Texas. I realized that when we moved here 5 years ago. But people here were friendly enough, so I was content.

Maybe this why this blog thing is so addictive. Its all about the extra conversation. Its all about other people stopping by to say hello. I love to here from folks that are from where I am from, or like where I am from. So far, my computer has kept from being so homesick.

Perhaps a visit is in order. I haven't been home in 2 years. The last time we went we enjoyed it because we saw new stuff and old favorites. We were happy to see that our little (pop.93,000) town wasn't dying, but actually thriving out in the middle of nowhere. Home is only a 7 hour drive away. I guess in the meantime I will just keep blogging and planning the trip back.

Mini Rant

2005-10-23T20:49:00.000-07:00

why Why WHY did Ritz Crackers have to take a song I love, a song that meant something to me and screw it up the way they did? "I'll Stop the World and Melt with You." They didn't even have the decency to use a bad remake!

Exterminate White People?

2005-10-22T10:09:00.000-07:00

I read this article yesterday on World Net Daily. I read it twice because I couldn't believe it! I thought white people were supposed to be the racists? The frightening part of all of this is that I know there will be people out there of every color agreeing with this guy! They'll say whitey deserves it. They'll say he's like this because we oppressed him. They'll probably leave snarky remarks on my comments section or even better, take my words here and post it on their own blog, and write about what a Bigot I am to have even posted this at all. I don't care. Bring it. (No one reads your blog anyway.)

But you have to wonder about what was going on there that night. Was it an all black audience? Were they all black? Were any of them bi-racial? What was he thinking saying such crap to people? 'Please help in the cause, kill a whitey today?' He's saying this is justified because we whites are trying to "kill them." He says we whites are "plantation masters." This is a college professor, guys. Read the story.

http://www.worldnetdaily.com/news/article.asp?ARTICLE_ID=46973

Nothing Quid Novi

2005-10-21T22:27:00.000-07:00

What are you doing here? I have nothing good today! Probably not tomorrow either. I can't seem to settle down enough to put together a coherent, interesting post.

Hubby brought up something the other day and I can't stop thinking about it. If the Oil business (Oil Bidness) picks back up in Texas we might be moving home. Odessa. Our folks own a home there. I would LOVE to go back. I love that house. Its huge. We still have a bunch of friends there. It would be a financially advantageous move if the job was good enough. Odessa has the friendliest people and the best Mexican food, ever!

I love Plano, and North Dallas in general. But Odessa is just a place I can't explain. I grew up there. I found beauty in the things that were not immediately recognizable as beautiful. It was the plains/desert. I'm still in love with the biggest sky I have ever seen. The sound of the wind whirling outside my bedroom window was one I used to hate. Now I miss it. Now the sound of the wind soothes me on the rare occasion I hear it here.

I really have no reason to be homesick. I am content here. The few times I had brought the subject of Odessa up to hubby he quickly dismissed it. I was just nostalgic for the home that doesn't exist anymore, he'd say. So this new possibility just threw me way off. Was he missing it too? Is he really just thinking ahead about his career?

I have to go think about this some more. Shame on you BWH. Now you have the wheels in my head spinning.

Little White Hat

2005-10-18T20:15:00.000-07:00

This is what I found when I googled Big white hat!

Die Phobien

2005-10-12T16:35:00.000-07:00

Phunny phobia for today is defecaloesiophobia, which is fear of painful bowel movements. Youch.

Demophobia is fear of crowds. Both my son, Tiger and I suffer from this one.

I'm too tired to blog much today. My neighbor's dogs are waking me up all during the night again. Wonder what the fear of losing your mind and choking the living crap out of a couple of poodles is called.

No clowns please

2005-10-08T22:32:00.000-07:00

Coulrophobia. Anyone who knows me knows I do generally have this fear. I pretty much hate clowns. Don't know why or what happened to make me hate them like I do, but its there. This is not even a fear that I would like to get over someday. I could live quite contently with this phobia.

Claustrophobia is one I would like to get rid of. Its not really small spaces that upset me, but crowds certainly do. Being in a place that I can't readily leave makes me physically upset. My heart starts to beat faster. Ridiculous things like a trip to Wal Mart during a busy time can turn me into a nervous wreck. I've never had a real panic attack, but I have felt just all tied up in knots over not being able to leave a place. I blame it on growing up in Odessa. It was so big, spread out and open. I still really miss living out there on the plains, even though I love where I am now as well.

And now for the Phunny Phobias for today:
Coitophobia. Please. That would be a disaster.
Chrometophobia. Fear of money. Huh?

And finally, some that I put together because they go together well:
Coulrocoprophobia. Fear of clown poo.
Cholerocynocypridophobia. Fear of angry, rabid, venereally diseased prostitutes.

barophobia

2005-10-07T18:09:00.000-07:00

Barophobia is the fear of gravity. This one boggles my mind! How does one have a fear of something like gravity? The effects of gravity....Yes. I understand that. I get that looking in the mirror everday. What does one do in the throes of that fear? Lie completely still?

There is also bolshephobia. Which at first glance I thought was fear of bulls**t. But its fear of Bolshevics. Hmm. I guess fear of bulls**t would just be b.s.phobia. I guess if I had that I wouldn't be able to read much on the internet!

More phobia fun

2005-10-03T21:20:00.000-07:00

Ok, I was thinking of a fun phobia to highlight for today. But there are so many funny ones I couldn't choose. So I am going to go through the A's and pick out the ones that I am glad I don't really have. And then I'll list one that I do sort of have.

Alliumalektorophobia. Thats the fear of garlic chicken. Wouldn't like to fear my dinner. And because I love peanut butter too I am glad I don't have arachibutyrophobia. (Fear of peanut butter sticking to the roof of your mouth.)

I do have Automotonophobia. The fear of ventriloquist dummies, or any that falsly represents a sentient being. Fuh-reaky.

2005-09-25T14:06:00.000-07:00

BigWhiteHat...
Matthew McConaughey...
Goateeeeeelicious!

Phobias

2005-09-19T21:26:00.000-07:00

I'm really glad I don't have peladophobia or pogonophobia. Also, its a good thing BWH doesn't have caligynephobia!

Little Fishies

2005-09-16T19:39:00.000-07:00

After reading Big White Hats latest post, I got to thinking about those little ichthus emblems on the back of people's vehicles. The cutest one I saw was a big fish with 3 or 4 little fish "swimming" behind it. The worst I've seen is the one with feet and darwin written in the center. Nice.

So I got to wondering why I didn't have an ichthus on the back of my vehicle. I like decorating my car as much as the next guy. I've got a nice USA sticker. A TX sticker. And a big D. Not for Dallas, or democrats, but for Deutschland. It could also stand for Duh, or Ditzy. But no fish.

Then I read more of his post. Ah the road rage! Very popular here in the metroplex. I engage in the rage every so often. Usually its limited to a few random shouts of *#@!!. Oh who am I kidding? Everday I have snarky remarks for other drivers. They don't usually hear me, but still. If I had that little fishy on my car I'd be pretty embarrassed. Maybe thats why I haven't ever affixed one to my car. There are enough people out there giving Christians a bad name. I don't need to add to the number. Its bad enough I have a problem controlling my tongue and my temper. I don't need to advertise to the world what a bad Christian I am.

I'll let you know when I buy those Ichthuses...Ichthii? Fish.

Laughing out loud

2005-09-10T22:43:00.000-07:00

Just like in 7th grade, only I wasn't drunk then!

Kung Fu 24/7

2005-09-10T21:26:00.000-07:00

Just saw the movie Hero, with Jet Li. A very artistic, beautiful movie. Now I am watching Zatoichi. Not as beautiful, but there is a dance scene, and they just are too cool! They are tap dancing! Straight up tapping like we do here. Only cuter because they are dressed up like geishas and in other various Japanese outfits! Must Get Soundtrack. Dangit! All the credits are in Japanese. Anybody out there know Japanese?

Seriously, somebody needs to put together a kung fu network. They'd play kung fu flicks 24/7. I'd watch 24/7.

My oldest daughter is 1/4 Asian. She's Bee-yoo-teee-full! She is 1/4 Thai, 1/2 German, 1/8 Czech, and 1/8 Russian. How's that for a mix!

Spoiled

2005-09-10T09:58:00.000-07:00

My weiner dog thinks he's my baby. Notice how he's just partly under the covers, and he has a stuffed toy dog there too.

No, he's not allowed to sleep there. But try telling him that!

Big White Hat!!!!

2005-09-06T19:22:00.000-07:00

LOL!!! You gotta love this picture. 1988

Quiet Wyatt

2005-09-05T19:48:00.000-07:00

I am a great aunt! I always have been, only now its official! My niece had this Cutie Patootie on August 24, 2005. His name is Wyatt. He is a sweet little thing. I was worried about going to see him this weekend. I thought maybe my baby fever would return. I was really surprised that it didn't. I will enjoy every minute of being his great aunt. I will cherish the rest of my children's lives, but the extreme urge to make more babies has passed! Ok, now everyone go and congratulate BigWhiteHat on not having to tell me NO.

Breaking up is hard to do

2005-08-25T18:26:00.000-07:00

The saying is true.
Its been over a week since I have been in a Wal Mart. I still have things around the house that remind me of my time there. Sam's water bottles. GV butter. Receipts cluttering my purse.

Since my break up with WM, I have had to do a lot more traveling to get my needs met. Usually I enjoy that. Shopping is fun, I admit. Unless I am pressed for time. Since I started this new job, I am seemingly always pressed for time. Sometimes I just need to get in and out, you know? Kroger is not too bad, but I am waiting to get done wrong. Maybe I am just gun shy after the whole WM thing!

I found myself slumming it today at the Dollar store. I needed an insulated drink cup to take with me to my new job. I found it, but it wasn't quite the one I really wanted. I just know the one I need is right there at WM. But I ain't going. I know I need to just get out there and look. I can do better. I will make it through this.

Another Breakup Letter!

2005-08-21T08:19:00.000-07:00

Leece said...
*sigh*I'm about to write a break up letter to Wal Mart too, only mine will go something like this: *ahem*Dear Wal Mart, You know, loyalty is one of my better traits... it doesn't seem to be one of yours and I'm tired of it.Why, just last week, I was in your grocery isle, cussing you for not carrying the very basics. I mean, when I'm looking for an original brand of chips or hamburger helper or even just a loaf of bread.. you're not there for me. Your aisles are empty as if you're laughing at me and flipping me the bird. I hear you giggling at me as I walk out of the aisle.. I hear you snicker when I sigh loudly because you don't even have freakin' plastic spoons for me to buy to carry to work to eat my Lean Cuisine that incidentally - I had to sift through the frozen foods counter in hopes of finding it.Yeah, I made that second trip back this morning just to check and see if your counters had been stocked, but alas, you just covered the empty shelves with more of the 'other type' rather than what I really needed. So guess what, Wal Mart? I cheated on you. That's right.. I slipped out and sleazed myself over to Target. And it was so gooooood. That bright orange decor was a nice change, and there.. sitting on the shelf, was the brand of STUPID KOTEX that I needed. That's right. You may screw me out of my chips or my hamburger helper or even my loaf of bread, but by God, when it comes to my time of the month, don't F*** with me.Sincerely, Leece

A Breakup Letter

2005-08-20T19:19:00.000-07:00

Dear Wal Mart,

I've needed to write this letter for a long time. I didn't want it to have to come to this, but after today I feel I just can't go on with you anymore.

I must also confess that I haven't been faithful to you. I've been other places bought other things. Things that made me so much happier than I am with you. Places that treated me so, so good.

At first I was enchanted by you. The all night availability, the low prices. How, no matter wherever I traveled, you were right there.

But then I began to see the real you. The bad attitude. The bad treatment. Today was just the last straw.

I won't be seeing you anymore. Please don't call me. Don't e-mail me.

Sincerely,

Echotig

P.S. I will be needing my $6.98 back for that bag of chicken you double charged me for last week.

Back to Normal, Sorta

2005-08-08T13:55:00.000-07:00

All of my kids went back to school today. I've been waiting for this day for years. I was so relieved I came home and slept from 9 until 1. I don't feel guilty about it either! I have been sleep deprived for weeks. If it hasn't been the neighbors yappy dogs its been my own kids. And then there's just the fact that I am an Insomniac anyway.

I still don't have a job yet. Not one that I really want anyway. Napping is not going to help with that, but it had to be done. It may be necessary to get a nap in tomorrow as well. Life is good!

Zoeisms

2005-08-02T21:27:00.000-07:00

Warning: The following story is not really that funny.

"Mommy, if I don't go to school will I die?" Zoe asks me this pretty seriously. I laugh and say no, and wonder why she would ask that. "What if I don't get married?" She asks seriously. I ask her who told her all that. She dodges the question, but I am pretty sure it was her brother Alex. He is trying to convince her to go to school. She keeps saying she doesn't want to go.(I never thought he'd resort to death threats though!) I guess his reasoning is that no guy will ever marry a dumb girl, and she'll never end up anywhere if she doesn'y go to school. He thinks about things like that alot. He totally knows what his life plan is already. He's 8.

Zoe getting to school this year is turning out to be a major disaster. She hasn't had to go to the doctor very much. So I hadn't kept up with her immunizations. She is way behind come to find out. (I'm really really bad about stuff like that.) Hopefully they will let me register her anyway. She got 5 shots last week. I didn't warn her about that before we went. But she did great. They promised her a sticker. By the time we left , they forgot about the sticker. I told her that we'd have to get 2 stickers the next time we went. You should have seen her face! "I am never going to the doctor again!" Very matter of factly.

I love that girl! I won't go as far as to say she is my favorite, but she certainly keeps me on my toes. She is a ray of sunshine on days that are otherwise miserable. Her whole existence is a ray of sunshine. When I found out I was pregnant, again...(the 3rd time in 5 years...) I was furious! I was so mad at my husband. (he'd refused to get "fixed.") I was furious that I was going to be pregnant again. I was so tired of being pregnant. I was furious with myself for not being more careful. 5 minutes after that, I was looking forward to having a girl. I just knew it had to be a girl. The odds were on my side. I had already had 2 boys, then a girl. Two boys again, so now it should be a girl. As if life really works out that way. (but it did!)

The whole time I was pregnant with Zoe I was miserable. My hubby has a daughter from another girl, and she decided to sue for more child support and less visitation. This was a long, drawn out mess. At the time she lived in Irving and we lived just outside Abilene. Thats about 4 hours. So we did alot of back and forth just to go to court for everything. And this chick just dragged everthing on. Because she didn't like driving to pick her own daughter up, she was trying to change the visitation to once a month. In order to do that she had to come up with a good reason to tell a Judge. She couldn't, so she made one up. And that was to try and get her daughter to say I was mean, and abusive. And so the court ordered a "family study" to be done by a social worker, in Ft. Worth of course.

That child's mother dragged the court case out til July 29th. I was due August 1st. She had asked the daughter over the phone when I was due. Yes, I recorded it. Now why else would she want to know? All this stupid drama over this child's mother lying about me and going back and forth to Ft. Worth. I was miserable mentally and physically.

Then, we won. The court found that there was absolutely no reason to reduce visitation, or increase support. It was finally over.

On the 4th of August 2000, I gave birth to a tiny little Zoe. She was the smallest of all my living children at birth. She weighed 6 pounds 13 ounces. I was so happy to have nothing to worry about now but Zoe.

Why do You blog?

2005-07-30T23:26:00.000-07:00

Interesting question, right?

I am the one that basically introduced my hubby to bloggin'. I think he really likes it. He is a very good writer. He is an even better speaker. And he's even better at debate. That doesn't stop me from arguing with him though. We love to talk. We have always been the type of couple that could spend the whole day together, and never run out of stuff to talk about. The only problem is that 3-4 days a week I hardly get to talk to him at all. Or many other adults for that matter.

He asked me tonight why I blog and I couldn't come up with a very good reason. I just like it I guess. I don't have the time or the money to do much of the other stuff that I like to do. I've almost always kept a journal. But blogging is different than just writing. You get feedback by blogging. I think that is what I like about it. I don't feel all alone in my opinions and viewpoints. And sometimes I just have to get stuff out of my head that he's already heard a million times. I can say what I want. Also, I love to read about the people that have read my junk.

So there's your answer BWH. I blog because I can. Ha!

Got a Good List Idea?

2005-07-30T04:51:00.000-07:00

I am feeling the need to make a good list.

On David's Daily Blog and Babble, he has one thats pretty simple. Turn ons/Turn offs. But now that I know people are actually reading this, I'm hesitant to open up about that. People used to read this anyway. Maybe I will leave that particular list on Big White Hat's private e-mail.

In the meantime, anyone out there know of a good list?

2005-07-23T11:32:00.000-07:00

Jacqui went home last Thursday night. I miss her so much already. We got to spend a lot of time together, by ourselves. She a neat kid. She'll be 14 in October. In a few years she'll be all grown up. Thats really hard for me to wrap my head around. I guess cause I only see her here and there. So it seems like she is growing fast.

She wasn't too bummed about leaving because she is going to a horse camp for a week. She's going to love it. I think the camp is in Prescott, AZ. Meanwhile I hear its 122 in Phoenix! I lived there the last time it was that hot. The planes couldn't even take off!

Anyway, I'm not too upset. I see her again in November!

I'm trying to get some pictures up here of the vacation stuff! I guess I have to re-download hello/picasa. Its hard being a computer dummy. Not even the books help.

The Most Awesome Vacation, EVER

2005-07-23T09:08:00.000-07:00

This, according to my kids, was the most awesome summer ever! Not only did we finally get direct TV so that they could watch cartoons ad nauseum, but we went on our very first family vacation! And the utterance of "this is the most awesome vacation , ever!" was heard many, many times!

Its always been difficult to get everyone together for a summer vacation. We get our daughters at different times during the summer. And of course theres the Tiger situation. He doesn't like change too much. But these last few months I have been practically forcing it on him and he has been great about it. I refuse to let his Autism be the only focus of our lives. I've seen other families that have every little thing revolve around their child's Autism. And that just seems so wrong and unfair to the rest of the family. But I have to admit that a big reason we went to the beach this year was specifically for Tiger. He can play for hours in the sand and water in the back yard. We felt the beach would probably blow his mind. All of his sibling agreed and thought it would be funny to watch his reaction to all that sand and water!

So the first night we get there we wander to the nearest public beach. None of us have our swimming stuff on. Tiger's face lit up like I had never seen. As if this was what he had been looking for his whole life long! He ran and ran and ran. He sat in the sand and scooped it up omto his legs. He even put it on his head. Alex and Zoe also ran right into the water. And Jacqui and Dezzie tip toed around it too. Then, Alex got stung by jellyfish. Which I should have predicted because he is always the one that gets hurt. Its almost funny. In fact there is a saying in our house, "its all fun and games til Alex gets hurt!" It wasn't too bad of a sting. But I could tell it hurt him a lot. It took us awhile to get Tiger back to the van. It took us even longer to get the sand out of our shoes and clothes!

The very next day we sought out a nicer beach. We ended up somewhere on Padre Island by some really big condos. We stayed for about 4 hours! The kids had so much fun. We all got sunburned, but no one got it worse than Dezzie! She blistered up and couldn't move her arms the next day. It was awful.

The trip was alot of fun, and a lot of hassle. the hotel was lame. Not everything went right, but we had fun anyway. My mom and step dad arrived the day after we got there. I hadn't seen him in a few years. He has Alzheimer's now, so it was really weird to see him. He is worse off than mom let on. I don't know what she is going to do with him. I don't know how she can work and take care of him. Maybe she will finally move back to Texas near me, so I can help them.

The day before we left Jacqui and I went horseback riding on the beach at Mustang Island. It was great! My horse was freakin' huge! The guy before me refused to get on him.(wimp) After I got on, the horse walked up to the front of the line and put his hoof on the gate a few times, as if to say, "Lets Go Already!" Jacqui's horse was smaller and faster, and pretty much led the whole way. She just loved it. If we go next year, which looks like a major possibility, we will go horseback riding more often. The horses are gentle enough to take all the kids. Jacqui and I are going to try for the last ride of the day, because the horses know its the last ride of the day and they run like hell!

It was really a good vacation. I can't wait til next year. We will stay longer and do more stuff. And now we know which hotels and condos look good. And to bring major sunscreen.

Awesome!

Now its a Break

2005-07-06T18:33:00.000-07:00

Zoe and Alex went to their grandparents yesterday. So now I am getting a little break. Its just Jacqui and Tiger now.

Actually its too quiet now. I miss them already! They will get back just in time to go on our family vacation to Corpus Christi. The kids have never been to a beach. Well, Jacqui has. We've never all traveled anywhere to have a vacation. So this is going to be a memory in the making. We will be going horseback riding also. I can't wait!

I wonder where everyone else went for vacation this year?

Countdowns

2005-06-10T19:56:00.000-07:00

Its 5 minutes to 10:00 at night. My children are not asleep. They are not even close. Wait, one of them is rolling himself up in a blanket! No...no..its just a game. He's laughing under there. Mocking me!

I got Jacqui here for her summer visit just this last Sunday. She's 13. No drama so far. Its a bittersweet visit. I am coming to terms with the fact that she has NO intention of ever coming to live with me. I know, things could change. But they could stay the same. She talks about what highschool she will be going to there in Phoenix. I don't want to hear it. But I say nothing. I think the sooner I come to terms with the fact that she has made her choice the sooner I will get over it. Sounds harsh, but I find it really hard to hang on to a hopeless situation. I think she is totally wrong, but she seems happy only seeing me 8 weeks out of the year. Unless her dad does something illegal I can't do anything much to change it.

Thats just five more summers. And what about after she is 16, she might want a job? 8 weeks a year, times 5. Thats just 40 weeks that I get her to myself. Thats what I have left of her childhood. She said, "Its not like I won't come see you after I graduate from highschool. " But after all this time, I find it hard to believe that she will either.

I know parenting is not for Sissies, but being a non custodial parent is just the twilight zone of parenthood.

Thank You, Innocents

2005-06-03T23:35:00.000-07:00

I debated myself on whether or not to write about what today is. Do I go into the bottom drawer and look at the pictures? Do I read the old letters? Do I risk the certain tears?

June 3, 1990 was the second worst day of my life. I was 19 and in a hospital in premature labor. I was pregnant with twin boys. I had been there for a week, bedridden, trying not to go into labor. But by the 8th day my body was giving out, my kidneys were going to fail. Labor was inevitable.

At 4:15 in the afternoon I gave birth to James. He weighed in at 13.8 ounces, and measured 11.4 inches. 3 hours and 11 minutes later I gave birth to Justin. He weighed in at 15.2 ounces and measures 10.6 inches. I got to hold them each for a little while. They were so early they didn't have much lung development. I was almost glad for that. I'm glad their time on earth wasn't spent being roughed up by a doctor, but in my arms. I cried and cried. The nurses cried. Then I don't remember what happened. I don't remember that night. I vaguely remember those next few days.

The nurses took some pictures of them. They are just grainy polaroid pictures, but I am grateful for them. thats pretty much all I have of them. Polaroids, blankets, their little hats.

June 7, 1990 was the worst day of my life. That day it was over 100 degrees, hot as ever in Phoenix. But it was windy. It was so windy that my tears dried off my cheek almost as fast as they fell. I sat there on a grey fold up chair staring at a hole in the ground. I felt emptier than that hole. It felt like an eternity sitting there, listening to the wind blowing the tarp around.

Then the hearse drove up and I stood up. My heart quickened. I'd never seen such a small coffin. I couldn't get over the fact that they were in there. I had to fight the urge to open it and get them. I need to hold them just once more. Just one more time!

After that day all I thought about was them, and how much I just wanted to hold them. I was alone alot. Nobody knew what to say. There was nothing to say. I wanted to have another baby.
I had gone from a girl who didn't want to have children at all, to someone who just couldn't think of anything else. A year and 4 months later I had Jacqui. No complications. She weighed 8 pounds, 4. ounces. Perfectly healthy.

Thanks to Justin and James I am the mother I never thought I would be. I don't know that there would be a Jacqui, Alex, Tiger, and Zoe, if it weren't for Justin and James. They weren't replaced by any means. I get to hold them every time I hold their siblings.

And its wonderful!

Bloodlust!

2005-06-03T11:37:00.000-07:00

Okay, as if the squirrel incident wasn't icky enough...

Today I was just driving down the road after getting Alex from school. I see a snake in the middle of the road! I turned the van around to go back to let Alex see it, and I asked him if I should run over it. He said YES!! with no hesitation. So I did. Then Alex was dissapointed because he didn't see enough blood.

Ahhh...its gonna be a great summer!

2005-06-02T22:54:00.000-07:00

Zoe

Zoe-isms

2005-06-02T22:35:00.000-07:00

For Sanderson

...in July we will be going on our first family daycation.

...a kid pooped their pants and Zoe said, it must have been diarina.

happy first day of June!

2005-06-02T09:44:00.000-07:00

UGH.

Our dog apparently killed a squirrel yesterday in the back yard and was in the process of eating when I let the kids out back to play.

They ran in to tell me that Summer was eating a squirrel! Summer's eating a squirrell!! They weren't grossed out. They weren't amazed that the dog somehow caught the squirrel. They weren't even sad for the squirrel.

And you know what I did? The good Mom that I am? Nothin. I told them not to touch it! And then, nothin. I didn't even go look. What was I thinking? A few hours later I went out there and saw the other dog chowing down on it. Thats a funny sight, a little weiner dog eating a squirrel.

Squirrel, its whats for dinner.

Worst Songs

2005-05-25T22:18:00.000-07:00

I am listening to Every Breath You Take, by the Police. Thats got to be the worst song to listen to while depressed.

Can anyone who reads this blog think of a more pathetic one?

That's depressing

2005-05-24T23:04:00.000-07:00

I've been in a depressed funk for the last few days and couldn't make myself write anything worth reading. I'm so tired of dealing with life.

I'm having trouble with my ex husband. He has custody of our 13 yr. old daughter and he is just such an ass when it comes to visitation. I lost custody of her when we divorced. I was not a bad mother, but when I left him, I came home toTexas with my daughter. I left him in Phoenix. Then he filed for divorce on me before I could file for divorce on him, and the AZ court demanded my daughter's return to AZ. The court delayed our divorce proceedings 4 times, and after almost 2 years we were finally divorced. I lost her because thet court found that he was "more stable" because he had a house, and I was the one that left. 3 months later he was living with a woman and her daughter in an apartment. But the court didn't see that. She wasn't school age at the time so all the divorce decree said was that I get her for 2 weeks every 90 days. When she started school he dictated when visitation was. I couldn't afford to get a lawyer and take it all back to court. Every time I threatened to, he threatened to not let her see me at all.I have put a recorder on my phone to capture the ridiculous stuff he says, so that the next time we are in court I can replay it for the Judge.

We have "joint" custody but I usually only get about 8 weeks a year. I should get way more than that but the system in Arizona is beyond screwed up. This last time I sued him for custody, after he kept her from me for 10 months, I asked the court to give us a written custody agreement. They didn't. So basically, her dad gets to decide how much I see her. And even the year I didn't get her wasn't enough to get him in trouble with Arizona. See, he started her in counselling a few weeks before the scheduled visit. The court bought that she was "stressed" about coming to see me. When what she was really stressed about was her dad's marriage. A few months after the counselling was over, he was separated. Now he's going through a divorce and even with all that, the court still thinks she should stay where she is. Its perplexing to say the least. The outcome was a shock.

Later I looked up this Judge, and she is fairly new. She's only been a judge for 2 years. I just can't believe she didn't even see fit to get a written visitation schedule, when that was so obviously our problem all along.

My daughter is under the impression that she can choose whether to see me or not.

This year I get to see her this summer and a few days at Thanksgiving. Thats it. Thats all.

Thats sick.

No penis envy here

2005-05-22T00:43:00.000-07:00

Professor Mikhail Sokolshchik of Russia's National Medical Surgical Center performed a two-stage penile lengthening early this year on a 28-year-old virgin, adding 5 inches to what was an almost dysfunctionally small organ. Sokolshchik first removed the tip and stitched it onto the patient's forearm so that he could graft more tissue onto it (from elsewhere on the arm). After the tip lengthened, he reattached it to its proper place. According to an April dispatch from Moscow in London's Daily Telegraph, Sokolshchik is optimistic that all functions will be restored (though he said the man will probably be permanently semi-erect). [Daily Telegraph (London), 4-10-05]

There is a surgery for this?! Does it have to be "dysfunctionally" small? And is 6 inches dysfunctionally small? Who determines whether it is , or is not dysfunctionally small?

Also, how long did this skin graft take? And what did the 28 year old guy do in the meantime? Was if from his right arm or the left? Is this why Russian women want to come here so bad?

I missed my calling. I should have been a journalist. This would have been such a great interview! It would have been huge.

I'm so distraught I can't poop

2005-05-18T19:10:00.000-07:00

Not the Hardiest of Citizens: Windsor, Ontario, hair stylist Waddah (Martin) Mustapha was awarded the equivalent of about US$270,000 by a court in April after he testified that he became racked with depression upon seeing a fly inside a commercial bottle of water at his salon. Presumably, damages would have been more if Mustapha had actually drunk from the bottle (or even opened it). As it was, he and his wife vomited, and he required extensive psychotherapy for nightmares, loss of sense of humor, increased argumentativeness, lack of desire to shower regularly, and constipation. [Windsor Star, 4-23-05]

Now why the hell can't I do this kinda thing? I certainly could use $270,000!!!! Racked with depression over a fly in a bottle of water? Constipation ?? I'm SO distraught I can't poop!

in Memory of Dominic

2005-05-17T23:40:00.000-07:00

Dominic Overton was a beautiful 4 year old boy who died Tuesday, May 17. He wandered off from his grandmother's home. They found him 3 hours later, and flew him to the hospital where he later died. He had autism. This was here in North Texas. Last year there was a 9 year old boy in Pennsylvania who wandered off in the night. It was winter. He died of exposure.

I am so upset by this, and I didn't even know these boys. But I saw their pictures and their big brown eyes and it just hit a little too close to home. My son has run off from home 3 times. He has no fear. He can unlock locks. I live with the fear that he will wake in the night and wander off. We live a block away from a big street.

My son takes the bus to and from school. The driver stops right in front of my house. Several times I have seen people drive around the bus as I am walking toward it to get my son. Today I saw someone doing it and I actually walked in front of the bus and screamed at the woman that she has to stop. (I never know if he will run off from me into the street.) She just kept driving. Nice.

Its very hard to have a child with a disability that doesn't look like a disability. I've gotten the dirty looks when Tiger's been too loud in a store. I've had one lady talk about my mothering skills , in Spanish, to the cashier as we were in line.(Hello! Just cos I am white doesn't mean I don't understand Spanish!) I was even asked to leave a store once because he was loud. On the way out of a doctor's appointment an old man told me that allowing my child to behave that way was very rude. I unfortunately don't have the time to educate these people about Autism. I can't predict when Tiger will be good or when he will be upset, loud and trying to run off from me.
But I take him in public as much as I can. He has to learn how to behave in public. I can only do that in public.

I find myself praying harder than ever that he learns to talk. That he stops trying to run away. That I can keep him safe from himself, and stupid drivers. That I never have to be in the cold dark place that Dominic's mother is in tonight.

Don't touch me

2005-05-17T02:15:00.000-07:00

My son Tiger has autism, and has some quirks about him to say the least. Some of them are strange, but also funny. Like he only wants to be touched on his own terms. If I so much as touch his arm and he didn't like it, he touches it in reverse. If I kiss him he wipes it off. He doesn't get upset, he just does it very matter of factly. He does this everytime.
Then there are days when he wants to be touched. He will take my hand and put it on his so I can rub it.Or he'll take my hand to rub his head. Or he will go for a big bear hug. But those days are rare. He will sometimes give you a kiss when you ask, but , again, only when he wants to.

I was waiting in line the other day at a restaurant, looking up at the enormous menu. I didn't notice there was a 3rd cashier waiting til the woman behind me poked me on the shoulder! I couldn't believe how rude that was. How dare she !!! I was so flabbergasted I couldn't say a thing. I was seriously hacked. And of course her order was to go, so by the time I got myself together there was nothing I could do about it but sit there and feel violated.

A few hours later I looked over at my son and suddenly it hit me how he must feel. So many of his weird quirks are also my weird quirks, but to the extreme. Does he feel that way when he's touched? Are we invaders of his personal space? I guess until he learns to talk I will never know.

I long for the day he tells me he loves me. He has spoken here and there, in frustrated , halting baby talk. He struggles to get it out. And then, other times it rolls right of his tongue. Like one year at Christmas I had been gone half the day at the airport. I got back late at night, but he saw me and said, "Mommy!" WOW!! Beautiful! That was 2 years ago.Last year he and his dad were play wrestling/tickling on the floor, and he said, "Get off me!" Clear as day. We laughed for half an hour.

He was 2 when we noticed there was something wrong. He didn't speak, didn't point, didn't play with toys right. He lined things up, by color or size. The teachers and therapists were perplexed because he was too affectionate to be Autistic. I am thankful for his affection every day, no matter how it comes.

2005-05-17T00:21:00.000-07:00

Tiger

Weiner Dogs

2005-05-15T21:34:00.000-07:00

I have a little black weiner dog that I just love to pieces. He has such a crazy personality.
I am printing out a series of bumper stickers, and I need some input on good sayings.

Vote!

1. Whats up Dach?
2. I heart My Weiner
3. Weiners R Us
4. Fear the Weiner
5. das Weiner

popularity?

2005-05-15T12:26:00.000-07:00

The last 3 people to leave comments on my blog were 20-something Indian guys. Very cool. I feel like now I finally have a following. LOL!

When I was 18 I didn't date this young man of Indian descent. I was in Illinois back then. I didn't date him because I was involved with someone else at the time, but I am not sure if I ever made that clear to him. He was so sweet and all that. He came to see me at work a lot. He helped me enroll in community college, because he thought it was so important that I go. It kills me to think about it because he seemed the kind of guy that would have spoiled me rotten with attention. We went out to eat pizza one night and the place was full of sailors. I think I was the only girl there besides the waitress. Anyway, he sat through about 6 sailors coming up to our table to ask me out! And he just laughed at me. I asked if he wanted to leave and he laughed and said , "No, this is entertaining!"

About a month later I moved to Phoenix, and I never knew what happened to him.

Sigh...

A Quizzy

2005-05-14T08:34:00.000-07:00

3 names you go by
1. Claudia
2. babe
3. Mom

3 screen names you have had
1. echotig
2. cmwpretty
3. claudia_petty2000

3 physical things you like about yourself
1. eyes
2. nose
3. shoulders

3 physical things you don't like about yourself
1. my feet
2. my hind end
3. my belly

3 parts of your heritage
1. German
2. Prussian
3. Texan

3 things you are wearing right now
1. pajamas
2. make up
3. underwears

3 Favorite bands/Musical artists
1. Los Lonely Boys
2. Erykah Badu
3. Duran Duran

3 favorite songs
1. Dime mi Amor
2. Hold back the rain
3. Tyrone

3 things you want in a relationship
1. Romance
2. trust
3. honesty

3 physical things about the preferred sex that appeal to you
1. brown eyes
2. nice, fairly big nose
3. big shoulders

3 of your favorite hobbies
1. blogging
2. music
3. cross stitching

3 things you want to do really badly right now
1. sex
2. have a huge breakfast
3. go back to sleep

3 things that scare you
1. Pedophiles
2. roaches
3. getting really fat

3 of your everday essentials
1. hugs and kisses
2. iced tea
3. blogging

3 careers you have considered/are considering
1. Photography
2. Modelling (before I found out I was too short, and before I got scarred up.)
3. Nursing

3 places you want to go on vacation
1. San Antonio
2. Germany
3. Australia

3 kids names you like
1. Zoe
2. Kalista
3. Jacqueline, Jacqui

3 things you wanna do before you die
1. be a grandma
2. own a sports car
3. learn to play guitar

3 ways you are stereotypically a boy
1. I love cars
2. I check out every body's butt
3. I don't listen

3 ways you are stereotypically a chick
1. I really love to shop
2. I love to get pampered
3. I put lipstick on while driving

3 celeb crushes
1. Owen Wilson
2. Tom Selleck
3. Matthew MacCon....a hey? can't spell his crazy last name.

3 people I would like to see take this quiz now
1. You
2. You
3. and You

Los Lonely Boys... Texicans

2005-05-14T00:13:00.000-07:00

Holy Crap I love this song!!!

Dime mi Amor.( Its on the Live at the Fillmore album.) Every once in awhile a song comes along that just gets my heart going. Don't know why. These guys are from San Angelo.

Maybe I am just homesick. How can I be homesick while living here in Texas? Its a damn big state! And although I love it here in Plano, its not the same as West Texas. Its a West Texas thing, you wouldn't understand.(hahaha!!!) Sometimes I just want some really good Mexican food. I want to breathe some hot, dry, dusty air. I want to hear the wind blowing around outside as I fall asleep. I want to see the biggest sky I have ever seen in all my life. I want to hear the deafening cicadas. Drive down a caliche road to nowhere. I want to hear all my Texican friends that have a thicker Texan accent than me.

Yup, I am completely missing home.

...on threats of suicide

2005-05-13T22:12:00.000-07:00

(Jerry I just read your thoughts on people who threaten suicide. I don't think you cold hearted at all.)

I never thought I would write about my dad. I never knew him. He died when I was 9 months old. When I was 6/7 my mom told me what really happened. He shot himself in the head. He didn't die right away. I don't know much more of the story. Its obviously a painful subject for my mom to talk about. Actually, if she is like me, she doesn't remember all the details.

So I went through the rest of my childhood feeling like he must have hated me. Kids blame themselves for things they have no control over. I did that too. I figured it out as an adult.

When I was a teenager my mom came home from work one day, obviously upset. She told me that a boy I dated briefly tried to kill himself. His mom had worked late and came home to find him in a bloody mess. He had slit his wrists and neck. Anyway, my mom asked me point blank if I had ever thought of doing that. I hadn't seriously. I said NO to her , of course. We talked the rest of the evening about it and what peoples motivations could be for doing it. He and I were friends and his actions had absolutely nothing to do with me. I think he was a little upset over some girl and he was very intoxicated when he did it. I saw him weeks later, bandaged and scarred. I don't know what ever happened to him . But I bet he is still scarred up.

I have always been less than patient with anyone who threatens suicide. I always tell them what my dad did, and how it affected me my entire life. What he did was selfish and wrong, but in a way it protected me. Because I love my mom so much, I never ever threatened suicide. I never really even contemplated it because I knew how bad it would hurt her. Later in life, after I had children, I went through some depression. I never let it go there because I loved my kids too much to hurt them in that way. I feel in a twisted sort of way my dad's selfish act kept me from ever going that far.

Suicide is a cruel and selfish act. Threatening to do it is even worse. I forgive my dad.

Sleeplessness is not good for Blogging

2005-05-13T13:14:00.000-07:00

I have nothing even remotely interesting to write. I slept here and there on the couch today. The dog situation hasn't changed. I somehow got about 3.5 hours of sleep last night.

I am watching Dr. Phil's 500th episode. I usually like the show. Sometimes it gets really Jerry Springer like. I like his show better than Oprah's. He just gave somebody a car for being a loyal fan. Thats cool.

My kids get out for the summer on May 20th. Its going to be busy busy around here.

Geez...what a boring post.

Fill in the Blank

2005-05-12T16:07:00.000-07:00

In a note to my beloved neighbors,

Your dogs kept me awake all night last night. If your dogs keep me up again tonight I will____________________________________________________________.

??????????

I will write an angry letter?

In a related story,

2 men were shot today in Plano in a road rage related incident. They drove themselves to the hospital. The shooter was later arrested. He's probably getting a nap now. Maybe his neighbor's dogs kept him up all night. See, here in Texas we are very much allowed to have guns. Maybe thats how I should finish that sentence. (insert evil laugh here.)

Help me fill in the blank. I am open to any and all suggestions.

unbelievable

2005-05-12T07:17:00.000-07:00

I can't believe how tired I am this morning.

Those dogs next door are pure evil. Everytime I even came close to falling asleep they'd go at it again.

So I finally call the cops at 2:30. It got much quieter around 3:00 so I thought, "Ahhh...he must have talked to them, it worked!"

WRONG

Around 3:25 their puppy starts doing its puppy whine. SO I call the police, Again. This time I say yes, I do want to talk to the officer. He's at my door by 3:55 and says there is pretty much nothing he can do. He knocked on their door and they didn't answer. He looked back there to see if anyone was our there for the dogs to be barking at. Then he gives me the number for Animal Control to call in the morning. The whole time he is on my front porch its dead quiet, peaceful even.

My son is already asleep on the couch for the night. So I begrudgingly head back to my bed. I must have fallen asleep around 5 or so. They did indeed start barking and whining again. But I somehow got an hour in there. The alarm went off at 6:20.

I have to be on the highway on my way to work by 8:30.Lets hope I don't fal asleep behind the wheel. By the time I get home from work it will be 1:30, and I have to get Alex at 2:45. Then all my kids will be home and I won't get a chance for sleep til tonight. And we all know what tonight is going to be like.

Good Night

2005-05-11T10:13:00.000-07:00

I slept unnaturally well last night. It was great!

I was pretty well drunk on champagne. (well, asti spumanti really.) It put me right to sleep. If dogs were barking I had no clue. If the house fell down, I had no clue.

It was really hard to read my regular amount of blogs while intoxicated.

Anyway, I hope all my friends out there have a beautiful day. Its a good one here in Texas!

Sleep Deprivation part 2

2005-05-10T07:10:00.000-07:00

The neighbors dogs woke me from a dead sleep in the middle of the night. I had to get up and move to the livingroom couch. I was too tired to even do anything about it.

The Plano Police non emergency number is 972-424-5678. Its going on speed dial tonight.

More Lists

2005-05-09T22:28:00.000-07:00

Did I mention I love lists?

This one is going out to my friends who may or may not already know these things about me. Like everything else in my life, its not complete.

1. I never went to my highschool prom.
2. I graduated from highschool a semester early.
3. I can sing, but have never sang in public. Or Karaoke.
4. English is my second language.
5. I play with my ears to relax or fall asleep.
6. I really still love Duran Duran.
7. I love bald guys with goatees.
8. I am a sucker for a really pretty face.
9. I think Brad Pitt is overrated.
10. Brown eyes are my favorite.
11. I eat sunflower seeds faster than anyone I know.
12. Halloween is my favorite holiday.
13. I have had 13 different jobs.
14. I love Martha Stewart.
15. I am a dog person, but I like the cats too.
16. I think Rush limbaugh is funny.
17. My dad's name was Wolfgang.
18. I'm a good speller.
19. My oldest son wants to be President someday.
20.My left foot is slightly larger than the right one.
21. Same goes for my boobs.
22. I've been told i think like a man. I take that as a compliment.
23. Rodeos get me..um, rowdy.
24. I hate trendy kid names.
25. I love being a Texan.
26. I love being a Scorpio.
27. I really want to be on "Who Wants to be a Millionaire."
28. I like Eminem.
29. I am truly not a morning person.
30. I never went to college, and it bugs me.
31. I hate poetry.
32. I have had 16 dogs, and 2 cats. Not at the same time.
33. I have lived in 33 different houses/apartments.

Things that make me wince

2005-05-09T13:54:00.000-07:00

I am feeling like a judgemental little monkey today. I just have those days where I want to call almost everybody a name (Dumbass is a favorite.) One of those days that my face can't settle down into a warm smile. No, its too busy scowling, scrunching up eyebrows,pursing my lips, and rolling the eyes. Its just me.

So I am thinking if I put it all down in a list, it may purge my brain a little and I will feel better. Maybe.

Lets start with...

1. Midgets doing termite commercials. God I hope thats only local DFW TV, not national.
2. Actresses portraying women in labor on TV, or in movies.
3. People that stay together for the kids.
4. People who equate their pets with my kids.
5. Feminine hygiene commercials.
6. Male erectile dysfunction/enhancement commercials.
7. Single people that give marital advice.
8. Women who've been cheated on, more than once, and don't know whether to leave or stay in the marriage.
9. Men who have cheated on their wives multiple times but want to stay in the marriage.
10. How Dr. Phil's is getting very Springer-esque this year.
11. Mullets.
12. Country Music.
13. Recording artists that feel they need to be political.
14. Teenagers that over pluck their eyebrows.
15. Women that wear their pants so low that I can't help but see their midsections.
16. People that play their car radio so loud that it shakes my car. Or my house.
17. Pierced tongues.

I could go on. But I will save it for another day that I'm feeling like this. Coming soon.

Quid Novi?

Allison Tepper Singer

Hello!!

The Best YouTube Ever

Little Bit Country..............

Lookalikes??

Inconvenient Truths...of Being Married to BigWhiteHat

A Wedding Invitathion...

Love Letterth

Inconvenient Truths...Of Working Out

May 1st

A Bath Loving Dog

Boooooooorrriing.

On Blogging

Sure, blame it on the dog.

No Really...a Boycott is planned May 1st

Buffalo Wild Wings

Week Long Counter Boycott Planned in North Texas

Tigons? Ligers?

Autism "Awareness"

From Jim Kraus

I Never Liked Sean Penn

Pity

Not Husband Quotes

Hot Husband Quotes

Roe V. Wade For Men

My Spiritual Weekend in Waco

Find the Weiner

Top Ten Reasons I Did Not Post Today

I Need A Sthecond Opinion!

A New Year's Update

COMMENTS POLICY

More Scents

Bad Scented Candle Ideas

Where did the Love Go?

60 Days

2006 To Do

Christmas was great!

On Mark Twain

PASS IT ON

Dear Santa,

I want some beans.

MMMM....Cocktails

Replacements

For Exile

A photo meme

All's Fair in Blog and War!

Haloscan

Y'all Look at This Here Tumbleweed!

Mini Rant

Exterminate White People?

Nothing Quid Novi

Little White Hat

Die Phobien

No clowns please

barophobia

More phobia fun

Phobias

Little Fishies

Laughing out loud

Kung Fu 24/7

Spoiled

Big White Hat!!!!

Quiet Wyatt

Breaking up is hard to do

Another Breakup Letter!

A Breakup Letter

Back to Normal, Sorta

Zoeisms

Why do You blog?

Got a Good List Idea?

The Most Awesome Vacation, EVER

Now its a Break

Countdowns

Thank You, Innocents

Bloodlust!

Zoe-isms

happy first day of June!

Worst Songs

That's depressing