Friday, March 31, 2006

From Jim Kraus

INTAXICATION: Euphoria at getting a tax refund, which lasts until you realize it was your money to start with.

REINTARNATION: Coming back to life as a Hillbilly.

SARCHASM: The gulf between the author of sarcastic wit and the person who doesn't get it.

HIPATITIS: Terminal Coolness.

Tuesday, March 28, 2006

I Never Liked Sean Penn

Hollywood activist SEAN PENN has a plastic doll of conservative US columnist ANN COULTER that he likes to abuse when angry. The Oscar-winner actor has hated Coulter ever since she blacklisted his director father LEO PENN in her book TREASON. And he takes out his frustrations with Coulter, who is a best-selling author, lawyer and television pundit, on the Barble-like doll. In an interview with The New Yorker magazine, Penn reveals, "We violate her. There are cigarette burns in some funny places. She's a pure snake-oil salesman. She doesn't believe a word she says."
27/03/2006 21:11

Wednesday, March 22, 2006


Main Entry: 1pity
Pronunciation: 'pi-tE
Function: noun
Inflected Form(s): plural pit·ies
Etymology: Middle English pite, from Old French pité, from Latin pietat-, pietas piety, pity, from pius pious
1 a : sympathetic sorrow for one suffering, distressed, or unhappy b : capacity to feel pity
2 : something to be regretted pity you can't go>

Pity is an uncomfortable word to me. Even though its one of the most natural human responses to a misunderstood situation it remains an unwanted feeling. When people see someone who has any outwardly misfortune its pity that comes to the forefront of emotions. Its a genuine emotion, yet at the same time you don't want the person being pitied to feel pitied.

Somehow I learned early in life that others don't want to be pitied. I didn't have a handicapped friend, or anything like that. I think I just knew that it must be uncomfortable based on how I felt when someone did that to me. See, I was an only child. I was Fatherless. I was always the new kid at school. I wanted friendships, but not friendships based on pity. I wanted someone to get to know me and decide that I was so awesome that they just had to be my friend.

My own empathy took on a life of its own at an early age too. There wasn't a stray animal that I didn't just love with all my heart. I took pity on any pathetic creature that wander through my yard. In school there was never a kid I didn't at least say hi to. Especially a new kid! In my teen years it got worse. If a boy asked me on a date it was hard to say no. I didn't want to hurt his feelings, yet I knew he didn't want a pity date either.

Then somewhere along the way my self centeredness overshadowed my empathy. I was so self centered. It was all about me. Me, me, me, me! Other people's problems didn't mean much to me because I was busy making mountains out of the molehills that popped up in my life. I was making stupid decisions and stupid mistakes all along the way. I knew I was. I prayed to God about it. I prayed for wisdom. That was my first mistake.

See, God answers prayers, but not in the way you want him to. You get to learn your lessons the way He wants you to. Through the consequences of every decision you make you learn your lessons. You also learn through the gifts. Through my children I have learned to take on the world. I have learned how to talk to people. And having an autistic child has taught me that pity, while a natural reaction, is not for me. Its not for my son either. I've learned that he wants the same things I wanted as a kid. He wants people to get to know him and decide he is so awesome they just have to be his friend.

Monday, March 20, 2006

Not Husband Quotes

10. I need to go buy some new underwear.
9. This TV is too big for the room.
8. Hot wings? I'm tired of hot wings!
7. Let's move the furniture around.
6. You drive.
5. Excuse me, can you tell me how to get to...
4. I don't want my boy playing football.
3. This steak is undercooked.
2. Let's get rid of my old t-shirts.
1. Just go to sleep already, I'm too tired...

Thursday, March 16, 2006

Hot Husband Quotes

10. I got a raise.
9. I already started dinner.
8. My parents are taking the kids for the weekend.
7. No, $100 is NOT too much to pay for a pair of
black pumps.
6. You've lost weight!
5. Dinner was delicious.
4. I bought you something.
3 I was wrong.
2. You were right.
1. I love you

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Roe V. Wade For Men

What about a man's right to choose? I have to admit they make a great point. I have been an advocate of Father's rights for a long time. I also feel they should be as responsible for contraception as a woman. But WAIT!! Am I saying that the time to choose is BEFORE conception?? Oh No...Is that what I am saying? Is that only a yes when it applies to men? I knew this question was going to turn up one day soon and here it is.

Everyone knows this suit is going to sink. Maybe they think whats good for the Goose should be good for the Gander. Maybe...but what about the wee little gosling?

That's what you get when you legislate from the bench!

Sunday, March 05, 2006

My Spiritual Weekend in Waco

...Now who on earth wouldn't want to eat at a place called Buzzard Billy's?

What a weekend! We had planned to drive to Kentucky to see my mom during the kid's spring break. But she has recently moved into a new condo and isn't settled and unpacked enough to entertain us all. So that is postponed until June.

We started the day by going to the Texas Ranger Museum and Hall of Fame. The only other plans were to go out to lunch then drive out to see family. Right after lunch we were headed back toward the freeway when we spotted it. There, in all its splendor, was the most beautiful museum I had ever seen in my entire lifetime. The Smithsonian, the Gugenheim, the Louvre...all Crap! That's right folks, this was the DR. PEPPER MUSEUM!

You see, Dr. Pepper was invented in Waco, Texas. And people wonder why we Texans are so proud...We invented Dr. Pepper for Pete's sake! This building happens to be the original 1906 Artesian Manufacturing and Bottling Company Building. It has 3 floors worth of Dr. Pepper artifacts. It was so beautiful. Really...words aren't enough. I'll leave you with the few pictures I managed to take.